Eight ways to make you dread Society
1. Take your time about getting ready to go; if you wish, you can even stop to read the paper; it doesn’t make any difference if you are a little late, no one should mind the disturbance.
2. Be sure you have not looked at your Bible outlines before you come to Society, so that you will be thoroughly prepared to know nothing about the discussion.
3. Take no part in the discussion, leave that to others. Show no interest whatsoever and pay no attention to what goes on.
4. Be sure you look at your watch every few minutes to drag out the minutes as long as possible.
5. Never take your turn in the program. Either make the excuse that you were not told that it was your turn or that you had no time. Both of these do much toward making things boresome.
6. While others are taking their part you can be of great service by day-dreaming or having some innocent fun whispering with your neighbor. You might even stage-whisper your criticisms of those who are always pushing themselves to the fore and running things.
7. And all the while you can think of all the wonderfully exciting things you might be doing and wonder why you are not doing them at that very moment.
8. As soon as the meeting is adjourned banish all thought of society until the next week. Ho, hum, those meetings can be such a bore.
The Four-fold Purpose of Beacon Lights when it was first published.
1. To unite all Protestant Reformed Young People’s Societies so that they may work in close unity and secure a sense of solidarity.
2. To seek the mutual edification of the members of this Federation and to strive for the development of talents as becomes Christian young people.
3. To strive to maintain our specific Protestant Reformed character with a united front.
4. To promote the welfare of the Protestant Reformed Churches in which we have a name and a place.
Beacon Lights, Vol. 1 No. 1
How to be Perfectly Miserable
1. Think about yourself.
2. Talk about yourself.
3. Use “I” as often as possible.
4. Mirror yourself continually in the opinion of others.
5. Listen greedily to what people say about you.
6. Expect to be appreciated.
7. Be suspicious.
8. Be jealous and envious.
9. Be sensitive to slights.
10. Never forgive a criticism.
11. Trust nobody but yourself.
12. Insist on consideration and respect.
13. Demand agreement with your own views on everything.
14. Sulk if people are not grateful to you for favors shown.
15. Never forget a service you may have rendered.
16. Be on the lookout for a good time for yourself.
17. Shirk your duties if you can.
18. Do as little as possible for others.
19. Love yourself supremely.
20. Be selfish.
Vol. 1 No. 1 Beacon Lights